Destiny
by shortlived
Summary: Aware of the dark fate that is to be her future, Rogue is given the chance to avoid it. But what is she to do when what is going to be, pales in comparison to what she could have?


* * *

AN/ Well it has been a while since I have written anything involving the X-men/Rogue. This has been in the back of my brain for a while, so thought it was time I articulated it into a one shot. Be forwarned, this isn't a happy go lucky story..

* * *

Rogue thought her future had changed after Logan kissed her at six minutes past twelve on that Friday night, thought everything that she had been told had been adverted.

But she put too much stock in it. Built too much upon the brief contact that had left her breathless and hopeful and just a little bit astounded. So long she had waited for him to notice her, so long she put all her dreams into him; all of it coming crashing down the next morning, when she found him gone, not a note, not a word left behind for her. Perhaps he didn't think much of the simple kiss they shared, but it had meant much to her,_ perhaps_ too much.

The dread came back then, the words she would never forget floating back to her as she wandered dumbly back to her room.

It was all about destiny in the end, all about destiny in the beginning. Only it was more than a word it was a person, one that seemed to be feared as much as the future itself could be. She had been drawn toward the girl at her very arrival, the strangely awkward eighteen year old with the dark black hair, the skin more pale than her own, and the strange clouded eyes that spoke volumes of her blindness. Perhaps it was because she seemed to be an outcast among outcasts like she had been when she was younger, like she sometimes still was, that had her reaching out to the girl.

But it wasn't the shyness that had people staying away from her, although that was how it started, but it was the fact that she said things, things that had the strange, rather frightful way of coming true. At first everyone thought it was just the girl's way of trying to draw attention to herself, but everyone quickly found out otherwise when Jubilee had accidentally fallen down some stairs and broken her arm..

Broken china doll.

That is what the girl had said, something that had been laughed off, but came back to haunt. Other things she had said coming true as well, Ororo meeting Forge, Hank discovering a long lost friend, the uprising of Magneto and the Brotherhood. It wasn't always bad things, but it made people wary just the same, something that had Rogue spending more time with Destiny, wanting her to see that not everyone was close minded, that not everyone was fearful.

If she had stayed away, if she hadn't tried so hard, would that have changed things? If she had never been told would it have still have happened? Rogue would never know. For her journey, that which her life entailed was something that seemed firmly settled, no matter how hard she struggled against it.

"I want to tell you something Rogue." Destiny had said, after entering her room, deftly reaching her bed without any hitches as she felt her way through, before she sat down on her bed. Rogue put her book down, giving her complete attention, there was something ominous in the voice, something she was starting to recognize and learning not to like.

"But first I have a question to ask you."

"Go ahead."

"If you knew _how_ you were going to die would you want to know?" She stared hard at Destiny, once more a little bit chilled by the serious tone she had taken on.

Rogue could have said no then, could have laughed it off as a joke and changed the topic of conversation. But she hadn't been afraid of death, not since her near experience with Magneto.

"It depends on whether or not my death has meanin'."

Destiny sighed as if disappointed, turning her head a little toward Rogue as if she was analyzing her. Drawing her body towards her she leaned against her legs, rocking back and forth gently.

"I have never seen someone's death before Rogue, all the things you have done for me these months, all the time you have spent with me, you're my only friend... I don't want you to get hurt.. I _don't_ want you to die.."

"Y'make it sound like it is goin' t'happen tomorrow."

"The Professor says that the future isn't written in stone," She began as if she didn't quite hear her. "that perhaps I can use my visions and help change what is _supposed_ to be, into that which _could_ have been."

"And what do y'believe?"

"That I wouldn't be shown these things if there wasn't a chance of changing them. So that is why I want you to know what I saw..."

She began to describe everything, soft voice oozing through small lips as she changed everything for Rogue in a matter of minutes. It wasn't just her death she was informed of, but strangely enough the whole thing revolved around a relationship, a marriage. _Her_ relationship _her_ marriage.

Rogue had laughed then. Knowing it would never come about; since her failed relationship with Bobby she hadn't really dated in years.

"When you are consumed by fire, when you become one with it... Then what I have told you shall transpire."

"Y'haven't told me when."

"Time is never fluid, circumstances are always changing and people sometimes take a direction they are not supposed to... although it leads them to where they need to be... When _isn't_ important. What _is_, is if you actually _want_ to change what is in store for you.."

"Why wouldn't I want to avoid my death?"

Destiny frowned, sighed hard and then slowly took Rogue's gloved hand into hers.

"Because if you do, you will miss out on a happiness you have been missing, a love that you have always thought you would never experience, and because if you don't die many others _will_."

Rogue had thought much about that conversation, that serious thing that had been underlined with so much foreboding and possibilities that she had started to feel fear. But then she thought of what the girl said about fire. Taking the thing apart and analyzing it at all levels. What Destiny could say wasn't always as cryptic as it sounded, sometimes it meant exactly what it said; the simple made clouded, the clouded made clear.

So for the first time in several years she thought of John. After all he wasn't called Pyro for nothing. Rogue could still see him from a time that seemed long past; standing on the porch above her, face alight with pleasure as he threw the cops back, cars exploding, fire building as he reveled in it all. What he would have done if she hadn't stopped him. Bare hand against his ankle, his power seeping into her as his thoughts brushed against her mind. They were more enticing then Bobby's had been from their kiss minutes previous, electrifying and full of hidden desires that simmered inwardly. But Rogue had pushed that all back, focusing on stopping John as she put the fires out.

Love him? She didn't think so. Yet, still she had seen enough of Destiny's powers to just toss all the knowledge aside. And then the incident with Logan. Why even for just that night had she allowed herself believe that everything had changed? That Logan, the loner and drifter was actually going to throw all his habits aside and start some relationship with her, and because of that, someway somehow everything would be changed... But it just wasn't to be that simple. And she wouldn't see Logan again for over a year. A year that went by dreadfully slowly, her pining away for a lover that would never be as she forced herself to come to terms with reality. A kiss meant nothing to Logan. Not like it did to her. And he would never care for her, not like she wanted him to.

It would be six months later that she woke up one morning and no longer felt for him like she once did, another three months after that that Destiny's words came into play.

For John arrived into her world.

Rogue had never really thought she would see him again. He was committed to Magneto and the Brotherhood, at least that is what the rumors indicated, but what she hadn't known was that somewhere along the line he had gotten captured by the government, imprisoned and tested. Experiments run on him and other mutants, dark rumors that finally came to the X-men's attention, forcing them to act.

Still she never expected to find him there. Huddled in the back of a cell, hard eyes immediately lashing onto her as she unlocked the human sized cage.

"Are y'comin'? Or do y'want t'stay?"

He stood firmly, still looking at her with suspicion and mistrust, but taking a couple steps toward her anyway, a rather forced smile on his face.

"Depends what is on the lunch menu today."

"Roasted mutant by the look of things."

"When you put it like that..."

She had grabbed his arm, pulling him with her, finding the hallway now filled with mutants running this way and that, alarms sounded that would do no good. For once the backup arrived Rogue and her team would be long gone.

Agitated she had been when he came with them, not that he had much of a choice. The government facility was on an island surrounded by miles and miles of water, and even if one escaped, a perfectly strong person would have had a time making it to any nearby land.

He had been confined to the Med Lab upon their return, and Rogue had tried to forget about him. Forget about the haunted look in his eyes, his body that was way thinner than she remembered, the way he had stared at her their whole trip back. She resisted though, and forced herself to forget. A thing that became difficult when she found out from Storm that he was staying for a time, willing to help them close down other mutant testing facilities with information he had acquired during his capture.

And then with him living with them once more, somewhat guarded and yet obviously allowed free reign of the mansion, she found him harder to ignore. He stayed in his room for the first week and a half, recovering from his ordeal as he kept to himself.

Rogue could still remember with such vivid clarity the first time she saw him after that, probably most of the residents wouldn't forget it either. For there had been a fight, him and Bobby wasting no time as each tried to show the other how much they had learned over the years.

She had been the one to stop it. Pushing through the small crowd of kids as she stood between the two, her gloves left behind in the grass where she had dropped them. Turning each of the others's powers off as she held firm to their hands, then pushing each away from the other easily in their weakened state. Seeing it was over the crowd departed, leaving her to go back a couple feet, picking up and putting her gloves back on as Rogue walked away. Emotions, feelings and voices whispered to her as powers collided and crashed within her. Memories rising to the surface as she felt terror and fear, felt people probing and cutting on her, filling her with chemicals and drugs; highs and lows, hunger and intense pain.

And then someone was touching her. Bare fingers against her own, strange touch that had her world coming back into focus as she found it burning underneath and around her. She heard his thoughts urging her, telling her what she needed to do as she extinguished the flames, smoke rising into the chilled air as it blew away.

She was surrounded by chard grass and trees, the mansion not in view, the only thing in sight was John, him breathing heavily as his eyes latched onto hers, darkly alive things that held her attention. Rogue didn't know why he did it, but it happened just the same, him dropping her glove he had been holding, taking one simple little step as he grabbed onto her right hand, pulling her toward him, giving her one long hard stare before his mouth plunged down onto hers.

It all seemed so familiar somehow, felt so good, her hands wrapping around his neck as he brought her even closer to him. Passion and need building up inside her as her mutation pulled, his breaths becoming more labored, until they pulled away from one another.

"That shouldn't have happened. I.. I shouldn't have done that shouldn't have.."

"You wanted that as much as I did.."

She pulled her body up, standing firm.

"Presumptuous comments for someone I haven't seen in years."

She ripped free from his hold on her arm, reaching down she picked up her glove, putting it on slowly as John watched with heated eyes, her now knowing how much it excited him when she used his powers, how much he actually enjoyed the feeling of her mutation pulling on her. At least when the pain subsided.

"I suppose you are _still_ with Bobby."

Rogue rolled her eyes, laughing shortly.

"No."

"But the way he looks at you..."

"I _don't _want to talk about it."

And they _didn't_ talk for some time after that, her avoiding him as best as she could, making excuses so that she didn't have to go on missions with him, doing everything in her power so that she didn't have to be near him. It was probably the fact that John couldn't sleep that eventually brought them together, her bumping into him on more than one occasion; for she loved the nighttime, loved to walk around the mansion, the darkness around her, the peace as well, as she lost herself in the tranquility of it all.

Somehow they got into a routine, them meeting each other at the bench on the south side of the mansion, them walking and even driving around as they started to open up in ways to one another Rogue hadn't thought possible with him.

For too long she had thought of him as a lost acquaintance, as Bobby's standoffish friend and then Magneto's stooge. But more and more her thoughts drifted toward him; his confidence, the way his eyes took her in as if she was the only person in the world that mattered. The way his fingers curled around her hand, heat pushing through the fabric of her glove. The way John touched her changing as the months passed, her feelings for him evolving into a warm lighthearted giddiness that she believed had the potential of being love.

When she discovered that, when the reality of what she was doing hit her, she pulled away from him. Not wanting him to mean something to her, not just because of what her future supposedly held for her, but because she didn't want to. The whole idea frightened her. How could she give her love once more to a man who was known for fleeing?

She hurt him tremendously then, Rogue saw that despite the fact that he tried to hide it, and yet she couldn't stop herself. He had already been left rather vulnerable after his experiences during his capture, and despite the fact that he was recovered physically she knew he was still tortured by it all. His nightmares he had shared with her, testament to that fact.

Trying to justify her actions she reminded herself how stubborn he could be, how forceful, how sarcastic and rude, how utterly nerve wracking or even cruel. Yet still Rogue had cried herself to sleep many a night after that. Her friends trying to offer her comfort as she tried to push herself through it. Feeling too close to him, she deciding on leaving, packing her bags before she spent one more night in her bed before running away; a tactic that was seeming more and more attractive, even if it reminded her of Logan, and even if it was the very trait that scared her off of men.

She hadn't dreamt that night, not that she remembered. But she had awakened, feeling strangely not alone as she opened her eyes. Springing up into bed, pulling the covers around her body she found John sitting on the edge of her bed.

"I won't let you do this Rogue. I am not going to let you push me away as if I mean _nothing _to you."

He kept his back turned towards her, a straight edged thing that displayed extreme tension. The sleep faded out of her in entirety as Rogue listened to him speak, a part of her wondering how he got into her locked room, feeling a breeze, seeing a window open she found her answer.

"We _can't_ be together John, I told y'we just wouldn't be good for one another.. And I know you have been longing to rejoin Magneto, I can't be with someone who..."

"Magneto means _nothing_ to me, what he is trying to accomplish means _nothing_ to me, when are you going to get it in to that thick, stubborn head of yours that all that matters to me now is _you_?"

She had cried then, liquid pouring down her face as she felt and heard the emotion in his words, the fierceness in his tone that dimmed into a warmth and gentleness that astounded. Despite herself she crawled out from underneath her covers, moving toward him until she was leaning into his back, arms wrapping around him until they were so close she could hear him breathing. Yet John pushed her off him, standing up as he whipped around.

"_Don't _touch me. Not unless you mean it."

Her head lowered as she looked at her bedspread, conflicted as she felt him hover over her for a couple moments longer before she heard him start to walk away. Jumping off her bed, her feet seemed to make her decision for her, practically throwing herself at John, as she reached out for him.

Turning around to face her, she touched him briefly with her hand, fingers brushing through his hair. Rogue saw the obsession in his eyes, the nearly maddening thing that shot thorough the air, forcing itself into her body as suddenly she felt it herself.

"I _mean_ it."

John reached for her, relief filtering through him as she wrapped her arms around him, his mouth lingered by her ear.

"Let me stay with you tonight."

Pulling away from him she looked at him with wide eyes.

"John.."

"I won't leave even if it means sleeping on your coach."

"Just to sleep?"

He grinned then, a rather mischievous thing that made her stomach tighten.

"If that is all you're offering."

She returned the smile, wondering if he could see her blush in the darkness.

* * *

It would be two months after that that Rogue and Destiny would speak of things again. Both sitting on the front porch, the wind picking up as it scooted dry leaves toward them.

"It hasn't changed. In fact my visions are becoming more clear... Rogue are you listening?"

She grimaced, exhaling slowly.

"John's asked me t'marry him...I love him.."

"I know. I just never thought it would happen so quickly."

"And if I marry him?"

"Then your death is unavoidable."

"If we leave the mansion?"

"It still follows you."

"If I _don't_ marry him?"

"Then your life and even the others will be safe now.. _if_ you leave him right now."

"I _can't_ not again. _Not_ ever."

"Then everything I have told you has been for naught, for _nothing_ will change."

"If that's what it means t'be with him..."

* * *

Two years they had together in all. She had never thought she could love someone so absolutely, that someone could love her so much in return, and that that person would ever be John.

If only he didn't worry about her so much. Maybe that would have made the years pass by a little more smoothly. More and more she was starting to believe it wasn't the smartest thing in the world to tell him of her fate. She had accepted it some time ago, before they were married, even perhaps before they had met again. But he refused to.

Rogue didn't want to die, even at the worst of times. Even when life sucked and people were uncaring and sadistic, a part of her always battled to get through it. Even as words that might as well have been malignant cancer spread within her she fought for her right to live.

"Marie?"

"Huh?" She had asked, barely awake, feeling a hand wander across her hip, going slowly down her leg. Warmth coming from the side of the bed to rest firmly behind her.

"I love you."

"I know John I love you too."

She turned slowly around to face him, no more words needed as he pulled her to him. Rogue lost herself in his touches, heat spreading as John's desperation for her grew. She could never get enough of him, sometimes she found it a wonder that they ever got any sleep at all. So fascinated in his body she was, so enthralled by the sensations of their contact; the way they made love that was as unique as it was mind boggling.

"I'll never let you die.." He had whispered to her, holding her close, a thin sheet between their bodies that seemed as cumbersome as it was needed. "Never.."

She could still hear his voice, still hear the whispers of his love, feel his body molded against hers, his fingers entwined with her own. Finally understanding everything as all the pieces fell into place, what Destiny told her and didn't, what her telling John of what was to come for her meant in the long run. The way his over protectiveness had led to the transpiring of the situation she was in now. But it was all too late.

For she was dying. Death catching up with her as she lay in her own blood, the only warmth she felt as her body grew cold. Her memories coming to a still.

Rogue would have never stayed home from the mission that night if John hadn't pleaded with her, telling her it was too dangerous, finally demanding that she wasn't allowed to risk it, for he wouldn't risk losing her...

It had been a long time since anyone had dared to attack the mansion, no one could have known that the Friends of Humanity would ever make such a bold move. Perhaps Destiny did though, perhaps she saw it all along, for she always said her death came while she was surrounded by friends, she had just always interpreted the words differently.

She had been the only trained X-men left in the mansion, the only one there to protect the children as she did her utmost to see that they got away safe. Rogue managed to sound the silent alarm as she tried to stop the intrusion. Using stealth and her intimate knowledge of the school she disabled more than a few of the soldiers, trapped a couple more.

And then they released a gas. A putrid smelling thing that drifted through the mansions air unheeded, the security protocols not activating soon enough as she fell down to the ground, coughing and trying not to breathe, doing the best she could as Rogue tried to reach the safe room.

Perhaps if she hadn't been shot, she would have made it.

"Tell me where the children are. Tell me their escape route."

She was kicked in the side, body rolling as she gasped for air. Throat stinging even as the security measures finally kicked in clearing the atmosphere of the toxins.

The fire place in the library she was in was still burning, Rogue felt that more than saw it, John's mutation a permanent part of her now, it calling to her as it provided her with a solution. The man went flying back as flames jumped at him, thrusting him backwards and away from her as she struggled to stand.

But it was no good.

Hand going to her body, she realized where she had been shot. Vision getting spotty as blackness circled around her eyes pushing through her retinas as they clouded her view. It wasn't so bad. Not really. The pain pushed back until all she felt was her body floating, extreme silence capturing her as she realized how alone she was. How utterly alone.

Rogue prayed for a moment; for herself, for others, and mostly for John. Darkness pushing itself back as light leaked in, a blinding searing blaze sweeping through her as the life that she knew came to an end.

Her destiny; her death; fulfilled.


End file.
